Okay, I have some energy so I should recount a few more vignettes. Let’s start with babysitting. My honey needed some help with childcare for her twins and, since I’m unemployed, I thought it would be nice for me to help out and watch the little ones for a day so she could get some work done. It started out badly; I forgot what day it was and showed up on Tuesday instead of Wednesday. She was still happy to see me, of course. Instead, I went to Cheers and hung out with one of the bartenders that was off-duty. He bought me a few drinks (I tip well) and we played pool, talking about the Marine Corps, losing our virginity, and music. I got rather hammered then bussed home. She came over that night with the car so I didn’t have to bus again the next day. She was substitute teaching at a high school that was far away (and far from the bus line) and wouldn’t have the car so we had to leave my apartment very early. I brought my sleeping bag so I could sleep on the couch (it’s a long story) while she left and the children slept. Their father woke up (like I said, it’s a long story) at around 8:30 and the kids got up a little while later. Their father and I chatted for a few moments before he headed to work. I made sure I had work phone numbers and a meal plan. Well, by “meal plan” I mean “the kids will tell you when they’re hungry and what they want.” I still make it a point to ask the children if they’re hungry or if they need anything once an hour or so, just in case. They don’t need much supervision through the day unless they want to go outside. They know what channels have cartoons and only need minimal help getting to kid-friendly gaming sites online. There’s also a console game that the boy likes to play. I only have to referee if the girl wants a turn on something the boy is using. He listens when I tell him his turn is up, but sometimes pouts. I was taken aback at first, but it’s easy enough to deal with a pouting child; threaten the dread “time out” or a forced nap. As much as I despise the world outside, they insist on some play time. I allow them to take some toys and remind them to not wander too far. They already know the rules; they stay within my eyesight while I [although I shouldn’t in front of the kids] have a clove off to the side, far enough away that they won’t breathe in the smoke but close enough that I can be there if they hurt themselves or need anything. I let them stay outside for about an hour. I think that’s long enough, but they still wanted to be with their friends and jump up and down and make noise; all the things they can’t do inside. Feeding them was no chore. Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, cereal, juice, milk; children have simple appetites. For the most part, I lounged on the love seat, glancing at the computer screen and television to make sure they weren’t getting into anything they shouldn’t. They didn’t. I’m not sure what my great fear is; after all they’re just small people, glorious and beautiful as anything.

So far I’ve come by a second time to watch them, but I only have one story to tell of that adventure. My honey had come home and we were hanging out for a little while before I took the bus home. Her daughter likes close attention and was sitting on the couch between us, holding on to her mother [she holds on to me sometimes as well.] I casually started to quiz her on body parts. She identified her eyes, ears, and nose. I start to get more challenging; asking her the parts of the sole of her foot. I show her where the ball and flat of the foot are; I think she knew the heel already. I ask her where the ball of her foot is a half hour later and she remembered. She also remembered forehead, forearm, and the palm of her hand. I feel proud; like I’ve done something positive.

I waited until my honey got home before I had any beer; I didn’t even bring any with me. She’d promised the children some candy if they were good while I watched them so we walked to the store and got them some sweets and I got a few beers. Smiling after drinking those, I took the bus home, promising to watch them next week.